10 Enticing BDSM Statistics & Facts to Shake up Your Day

NIKOLINA JERIC, JANUARY 30, 2021

Sex is one of the basic human needs. However, our society seems to equal sex to “making love,” although it exists and manifests in many forms. If you open your mind to the world of fantasies, roleplay, pain, and pleasure, you might discover something new about yourself.

These BDSM statistics will show you that more people than you realize enjoy non-mainstream kinks and fetishes. It will introduce you to the exciting world of BDSM and its accepting community. 

Hopefully, it will help you understand the appeal, and show you the ropes of BDSM, forever eliminating the fear of something that’s actually not scary or unusual at all.

Top 10 BDSM Statistics in 2021:

  • Family court judges used to remove visitation rights and child custody from parents who participated in consensual BDSM.
  • Little known BDSM facts reveal that BDSM was classified as a mental illness in 1905, and remained so until 2013.
  • Fetish stats reveal that 30 out of 55 sexual fantasies rank as very common.
  • 23% of women add handcuffs to the list of kinks they would like to try in the bedroom.
  • If you’re wondering how many people died from BDSM, statistics say—three over the course of 25 years. 
  • 99% of practitioners associate BDSM with pleasure, according to recent statistics on BDSM.
  • 61% of Italians aren’t familiar with the BDSM community.
  • 46.8% of Belgians said they participated in a BDSM activity sometime in their lives.
  • BDSM facts reveal that it doesn’t cause more distress in sexual functioning than non-BDSM sex.
  • When it comes to mental health and BDSM, statistics indicate that practitioners are more satisfied with their sexuality.

General BDSM Statistics to Spice Up Your Day

If you’re not practicing BDSM, chances are that you know very little about it once we exclude prejudice and popular myths and misconceptions. We’re presenting you with some basic info that’s worth knowing about BDSM.

1. Little known BDSM facts reveal that BDSM was classified as a mental illness in 1905, and remained so until 2013.

(Psychology Today)

Although it remains unknown when people started practicing BDSM for pleasure, Sigmund Freud decided that this kind of kink was a sign of severe neurosis and it remained so until fairly recently. 

2. Family court judges used to remove visitation rights and child custody from parents who participated in consensual BDSM.

(The Journal of Sexual Medicine)

Before the American Psychiatric Association made a clear difference between consensual kinks and fetishes associated with BDSM and paraphilic disorders, family court judges frequently took away child custody and parents’ visitation rights. 

Discipline, bondage, dominance and submission, sadomasochism, cross-dressing, and fetishes are all part of being a sexual deviant and not related to paraphilic disorders. Positive statistics on BDSM show that the discrimination against those who practice BDSM has decreased over the years thanks to this differentiation.

3. 46.8% of Belgians said they participated in a BDSM activity sometime in their lives.

(The Journal of Sexual Medicine)

If that isn’t enough to prove how common BDSM actually is, 22% of respondents said they had fantasies about it, little known BDSM facts reveal. 12.5% of respondents said they performed BDSM regularly. 26% said BDSM interested them, while 7.6% identified themselves as BDSM practitioners.

4. 61% of Italians aren’t familiar with the BDSM community.

(Statista)

While the majority hasn’t heard about the BDSM community, 21% are not a part of it, nor do they want to become a part of it, according to fetish stats. Also, 7% stated they were curious about it, while 4% expressed aversion towards the BDSM community. 

Only 2% said they belonged to the community. It seems that human sexual activity is less open in Italy than in Belgium.

5. 23% of women add handcuffs to the list of kinks they would like to try in the bedroom.

(Statista)

21% expressed interest in using vibrators, while 20% said they would like to use BDSM equipment like ropes and whips during sex

Fetish facts say 20% wanted to use love eggs, while 18% said they would like to try using a lubricant. 15% of women said they would bring anal toys and strap-ons into the bedroom. 

21%, though, said they wouldn’t like to use any of the toys mentioned above.

6. Fetish stats reveal that 30 out of 55 sexual fantasies rank as very common.

(Wiley Online Library)

Fetish statistics clearly state that only nine were labeled as unusual, while only two were found to be rare. Fantasies concerning submission and domination were common for both genders and closely related to each other.

7. If you’re wondering how many people died from BDSMstatistics say—three over the course of 25 years. 

(Pubmed)

Of course, we have to take into consideration that the majority of these cases probably remain unreported. The study in question analyzed 74 reported cases of deaths that occured due to sexual activities and only three involved consequences of BDSM.

8. Australians are more likely to have non-mainstream sexual experiences.

(Science direct)

Kink statistics tell us that those who engaged in BDSM have also experienced oral and/or anal sex, as well as sleeping with someone other than their partner. Phone sex, watching porn, using sex toys, having group sex, rimming, and fisting, were also parts of their fetish list. 

It should be noted that these people were no more likely to be forced into sexual activity and weren’t more likely to be unhappy or anxious.

BDSM Psychology — Why Do We Like BDSM?

Even though society would have you believe that people who practice BDSM need clinical treatment, a number of studies have shown that BDSM practitioners display more favorable traits. To help break this stereotype in 2021, we give you different stats and facts to support the case. 

9. BDSM facts reveal that it doesn’t cause more distress in sexual functioning than non-BDSM sex.

(Wiley Online Library)

Mental health and BDSM statistics have shown that BDSM contexts cause the same distress in women’s sexual functioning as non-BDSM contexts do. 

When it comes to men, it was shown that there’s actually less distress in sexual functioning in BDSM contexts. 

Sexual satisfaction remained the same for both genders regardless of the context.

10. Those who practice BDSM show more favorable character traits, based on various sexual fetish statistics.

(Wiley Online Library)

Numbers on these types of kinks show they were more extraverted and conscientious, had a higher openness to new experiences and higher subjective well-being, and were less neurotic and agreeable. This proves that BDSM isn’t a way of expressing psychopathological processes but is instead a fun pastime activity.

11. When it comes to mental health and BDSM, statistics indicate that practitioners are more satisfied with their sexuality.

(The Journal of Sexual Medicine)

An important part that contributes to feelings of satisfaction (especially in dominants) is the open discussion about sex and the preferences, desires, and needs of both partners. The fact that explicit consent is required may also play a significant role in these results.

12. 99% of practitioners associate BDSM with pleasure, according to recent statistics on BDSM.

(Psychology Today)

Positive emotions follow closely with 97%. It is interesting to note that all other associations remained positive and scored high: personal freedom in 90% of cases and self expression in 91%.

FAQ

What is BDSM?

(Her Campus)

The BDSM meaning is actually for bondage, dominance and submission, and sadism and masochism. The definition of bondage is to tie your partner’s limbs using restraints, the most common being handcuffs, rope, or chains. It may also include psychological restraint and physical punishment (such as spanking or whipping). 

Dominance and submission are the mental aspects of BDSM. It’s a common misconception that BDSM is all about pain, but one of the most evident BDSM facts states that it’s actually about the exchange of power. One partner is in control, while the other one agrees to give up control as much as they’re comfortable with. The key to such a relationship is consent, as the point of BDSM is for everyone to enjoy themselves.

Sadism and masochism are also very important aspects closely tied to consent. This is the exchange of emotional and physical pain between partners. Sadists draw pleasure from inflicting pain on their partner, while masochists draw it from receiving the pain.

Is BDSM sex safe?

(Her Campus) (GQ)

Safety and consent might just be the two most important aspects of submissive sex. Nobody in this community actually wants to hurt someone else; it’s all a part of roleplaying and going along with what the submissive partner is comfortable with. This is why the submissive partner can set hard limits, i.e., list the things they would not be willing to do under any circumstances.

If the submissive partner feels they just aren’t emotionally or physically comfortable at any point during the sexual forte, they can use their safe word, as S&M statistics clearly show. This is a clear sign for the dominant partner to stop immediately.

Aftercare is a consistent part of BDSM to ensure that both partners are comfortable with what happened and that nobody crossed any boundaries. Aftercare mostly focuses on the submissive partner because they are typically the ones with the emotional and physical bruises. Reassurance, gentle physical contact like cuddling, and open communication are key to sustaining a healthy and trusting BDSM relationship.

What do I need to know about DDLG?

(DDLG playground)

DDLG BDSM is an acronym for Daddy/Little Girl and a subcategory of BDSM. This is a type of BDSM relationship where one partner (Daddy or Mommy) nurtures the Little Girl/Boy or acts like their caregiver. The submissive partner plays the role of the “child.” 

This kind of relationship typically involves age regression to various extents while giving up control at the same time. That’s why it’s also called age play. Essentially, the submissive allows the dominant to take care of them in any way they’re both comfortable with. There are a lot of different variations of this fetish. In fact, sometimes the relationship doesn’t have to be sexual at all; just emotional.

(DDLG playground)

Even though a DDLG relationship may be just pure innocence combined with a deep emotional connection, it can actually be quite kinky and sexually freeing. Behaviors are rewarded and punished, depending on whether the Little Boy/Girl has played by the dom’s rules. Punishments may involve flogging, spanking, or whipping. Fetish statistics note that consent plays a huge part here too, which allows both partners to get out of their comfort zone safely and explore their sexuality together.

Orgasm denial, using various toys for pain and pleasure, and not allowing the Little to masturbate without permission can all be different types of kinks found in a DDLG relationship.

Conclusion

BDSM is a wonderful form of sex that lets people be who they really are and allows them to live out their wildest fantasies. It’s human nature to be curious, and these BDSM statistics show us that a lot of people have actually given in to curiosity regardless of how taboo the topic might be in their community. 

If you’re drawn to BDSM and would like to give it a try, but you are still unsure about approaching the matter without guilt or shame, we recommend BDSM dating sites as a starting place.

Expressing yourself sexually and enjoying your sexual freedom can only help you mature and live a happier life. Regardless of whether BDSM is your thing or not, we can all agree there’s something purely fascinating about it.

Sources:

Nikolina Jeric

As a student of English literature, Nikolina has always been passionate about reading and writing. Whether it’s for work or pleasure, she finds she best organizes her thoughts on paper. This is evident in her poetry and short stories, but also in the articles she writes professionally. Her love for writing and educating others has motivated her to research topics she likes in extreme depth, especially love and relationships. Her new-found knowledge and reputation raised her status from amateur to expert in this field, and helped her become the co-founder of 2Date4Love.